A Star I Can't Reach

by Matt Lowery

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    300 unique limited edition cd's have been pressed. Featuring artwork by Justin Falk, and screen printed by Justin and Matt. All cd's are numbered, and each one bears unique character from the hand silk screening process. Get yours before they're all gone, because we might not make any more of them!

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about

An EP about doubt, certainty, and learning to love in the middle of it all.

credits

released 30 May 2011
Music and Lyrics by Matt Lowery.
Recorded by Dustin Ragland at Duplecio Studio in Oklahoma City, OK, and mixed by Dustin at Blackwatch Studio in Norman, OK.
Mastered by John Mayfield in Nashville, TN.
Artwork by Justin Falk.

tags

tags: indie melodic pop rock Oklahoma City

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Track Name: Vision
I’m here looking for direction
Begging for a new affection
I’m too scared to do this now

My heart sees in double vision
and breaks in the indecision
between love and what’s easy now

(so come on)
I’m dying just to know the answer
To feel the light of day shine brighter

Discernment is getting harder
It’s like breathing under water
I can’t do this, can’t make it work

And my heart’s beating ever faster
Cause this chance could be a disaster
And that could be just what I need

(so come on)
I’m dying just to know the answer
To see the light of day shine brighter
We want to know the answers quickly
To see the light of day shine brighter
Cause I don’t want to do this wrong now, babe
Track Name: Whispers
In a hint, in a flash, in a bang we can change for the worse
In a wince, in a sting, in a pain we can live for the first
for the first time, for the first time in years

In a breath, in a word, in a song I can be what you need
In your touch, and your eyes and your smile I can finally believe
That you want me and you need me like I am

And it’s harder than hell to believe what I learned as a child
That the Lord’s gonna curse me and haunt me if I’m running wild
If I don’t see, if I don’t see how I’m wrong

With a choke, and a smile, and a thought that will not go away
There’s a fire in my chest when I ask you if you want to stay
Cause I want you, I want you, I want you so bad
And I need you, I need you, I need you so bad

Oh, for you to say you long
For lips in fevered rhyme and song
for honest breath from a lying chest and face

For love gone daft in endless spire
Laid to rest in my desire
For coming down in cool embrace

And they’re usually right, but I just gotta know for myself
Whether my heart and skin are for me or for somebody else
When I’m like this, when I’m like this, when I’m like this I’m yours
And your whispers, your whispers, your whispers, they are mine
Track Name: Ostia
Streets, streets, busy streets, I walk on them
Like a steady beat I fall upon them
Run from A to B, moving so fast
Crossing items off lists that won’t last

I am a dilemma with two legs
I’m a heart whose master is his head
To pray for love and want safety instead
Would tell the story of the life I’ve led

Questions killing me softly, slowly
Answers hiding in the ground below me
Certainty is like a star I can’t reach
Flickering somewhere in the distance brightly

I am contradictory at best
A skeptic’s heart inside a stoic chest
I know the truth and it won’t let me rest
But still I cling to doubts that I know best

In a life that comes and goes so fast
I’ll for love forsake the firmest grasp
On the truths and memories that pass
Between the air that gives me life at last
Track Name: Waiting Room
the sun's still down on my morning drive
and the fog is thick on I-35
as the whole world blinks and comes alive in red

It's not the day, but the promise of
that wakes the world with a gentle shove
and breathes new life in the flesh and blood out here

Oh my soul is longing for the coming of the day
For the sun to rise send the darkness on its way
Oh my soul is aching for the moon to hide

My heart skips and beats in tune
with an EKG in a waiting room
and clocks that tick but barely move at best

My hands shake to the rhythm of
A heart that's scared and lost in love
for a brand new life in the middle of first breath

All the heart is sitting in the waiting room of time
Wearing down my fingernails until the day arrives
Rocking back and forth until the journey home

And when the end is come
Will I find a new beginning?
Will we gaze above
To find the tired sky is thinning?
Cause we have waited, God you know we have
Track Name: God of My Father
God, God of my Father
God of my mother
can you hear me now?
I am a stranger
I am a wanderer
Who is finding out

the hardest lessons for himself
for his stubborn faith in no one else

God, God of the strongest
God of the weakest
can you save me from
doubt that will kill me
and anger that wills me
to step out further

from the only ledge I'm hanging on
into the fears that haunt me all along

God of my father, can you hear me now?

Cause my greatest fear is finding out
my best intuition was my doubt
God of my father, can you hear me now?
Track Name: Starting Over
Shots ring out in the war between emotion and reason
When my mind finds out that my heart has been guilty of treason
And my soul conspires without my consent against my plans
And my whole unconscious wars against the work of my hands

I’m starting over now that I am finally learning how

Bombs rain down and they scream that my dreams are illusions
That my hope is false and my mind has been awash in confusion
At the end of the day I am worn out from keeping the peace
Between the way things are and the way that I know they should be

I’m starting over, over now
That I am finally learning how
To feel the weight of all my heart
And let the light of day shine large

And I’m here because you held on to me
Oh when I was crashing like a wave of the sea
And I’m breathing cause you gave me a name
And you called it in the dark till I came